watch me! watch me! I’m gonna jump!

The ad copy on this one suggests that it “will make an angel collector jump for joy.” Which is odd considering that the little feetie-pajamas angel looks like she’s about to belly-flop onto the baby, and that can’t be safe. Perhaps the angel could redirect her divine energy into doing something useful, like freeing the poor little sheep trapped in the crook of the J.

highdive.jpg

Mary? Joseph? I get that it’s convenient to just leave your kid with the angels and go off and do whatever. I’m just not sure you’re screening Jesus’ caregivers well enough.

As long as we’re looking at angels who are not doing their jobs, let’s pull out this next exhibit.

lostchild.jpg

This angel is not in control of the situation. This angel is about to let Santa take that baby back to the North Pole. To be raised by elves. That’s. Not. Right. You know what goes on there.

12 thoughts on “watch me! watch me! I’m gonna jump!

  1. Di

    Excellent! 2 pictures in one day : )

    The first picture justs makes me feel all Christmassy because all I can think is, “It’s all about the O” and free shipping! It didn’t make me jump, sorry to say.

    What’s with the powder blue suit? Did the elves forget to pick up the dry cleaning?

  2. will

    santas got the pedosmile thing going on, its kinda creeping me out. you’d think that with the angels jedi mind powers she would notice stuff like this. they really need to get on the job.

  3. Katherine

    Sara has covered about everything that needs to be said about No. 1. No more snarky comments here.

    But I agree with Will, the second picture is creepy. This angel is obviously not old enough to be babysitting – in fact, she probably still needs a babysitter herself. And if Powder Blue Man is the sitter, we need to call the cops.

    And wrap that baby up, it’s cold in December! (in the northern hemisphere).

  4. patois

    I just came across an ornament with “A Merry XMas” with Santa Claus holding Jesus. I posted it on my site. I don’t know if you accept “donations” of these sorts, but Florinda mentioned your site, and it seems right up your alley.

  5. Arlene

    That’s no Santa in the second picture. That’s Santa’s evil brother, and he’s known for his pedophile ways. Oh, who will think of the children?! Okay, the more I look at that second one, the more disgusted I feel…ugh…

  6. Narya

    I think it would be interesting to see which animals are permitted/encouraged to hang out with baby J. Clearly bunnies and sheep are permissible, but aardvarks? Not so much. And snakes are right out, I’m guessing.

  7. Neb

    No, no, no…we’re missing the point on scary item #2. Reputable Bible scholars know that Jesus was not really born in “December”/winter, but probably in “September” or the at the end of the summer. Think about it: shepherds in the fields with their flocks? A major census going on? Not in the dead of winter. Since the baby in this disturbing sculpture is clearly not a newborn, but perhaps a month old, it’s obvious to me that this is Mary and Joseph in fancy dress, on their way to a Halloween party. Easter Bunny will handle the baby while they’re gone, as he’s on vacation for a few more months.

  8. Margaret

    “Make an angel collector jump for joy.”

    And just make the rest of us want to jump off a building.

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