Don’t worry guys, there’s nativity fug for you, too! Nativity ties for everyone!

I’m pretty sure the one on the far left isn’t supposed to be the silhouette of two people playing pattycake over a tiki lamp. But what do I know.

I’m not checking out your rack, I’m following the star.

Are you sure this is sparkly enough? I’m worried that it can’t be seen from space.

This weekend, we celebrate the nativity as fashion icon. You don’t get much more stylish than this:

Better to have Camel Arm than cameltoe, but still.

…and, if so, was it accompanied by a fiddle player and a strange Dolly Parton-esque angel? Were you visited by the three wise cowpokes?

I’ve been looking at this for days, and I still don’t know what Joseph is wearing. Or why they are pupil-less freaks wearing too much eyeliner. Or why the baby is wearing a bonnet stolen from the Holly Hobbie I had in 1976. I don’t know why Jesus’ feet are gigantic. I don’t know what happened to the rest of their noses. Advent, a time of mystery!

I just feel like Mary and Joseph are a bit overdressed for stable life. And where are they going to plug in their techno fiber optic collars?

The baby just looks distressed by it all. Or maybe he just figured out that breastfeeding in that outfit is going to be really, really complicated.